My first post-secondary education experience was at Colby College in Waterville, Maine. As a residential student, I was placed in a dormitory with a peer who was an international student from South Korea. Initially the two of us acted pleasantly and courteously towards each other; however, as semester progressed, a few little minor problems escalated into major issues between the two of us roommates. While I initially attempted to resolve these issues with peaceful means including friendly conversations about our conflicts and how we could create an environment that would allow us to coexist, first with just the two of us and then with our resident assistant, our behaviors towards each other became much less mature as time went on.
One afternoon, towards the end of this first semester, I was leaving our room when I noticed that she had forgotten her room key inside our room. In this moment, I faced the decision as to whether or not I leave and lock the door, as keeping our door locked when we were both out of our room was one of our policies we made in our roommate contract, or to make sure she had access to her key before I locked the door. I knew that locking the door with her key inside the room would be morally wrong; however, I felt tremendously tempted to spite her, as well as, in juvenile fashion, try and make her understand how upset I was with her. Thus, I left and locked the door feeling justified because, regardless of the fact that I knew she would be locked out, it felt like the only thing I could do to “teach her a lesson” and provide myself a small amount of pleasure after months of the inadequate living situation. What resulted of this decision was that when my roommate returned to our dormitory I had not yet returned, therefore she was unable to gain entry until she contacted someone from residential life to allow her to enter our room. This cost her nothing but a small amount of time and energy to resolve, yet this decision generated momentum which lead us to a point that we both understood that there would be patching our shaky relationship. That being said, although my decision granted me an instant pleasure knowing that I had acted out in a form of revenge, there was a lasting negative effect on our relationship and the decision brought much less pleasure to my life overall. Thus, retrospectively, I do not believe that locking her out of the room was the right thing to do. When considering this situation, however, a right result perhaps could have made this decision the right thing to do, in view of the ethical principle of utilitarianism. “To put aside resentment or moral indignation and forgive in the face of ongoing abuse,” Boss (2011) writes, “serves to absolve oppressors of any need to change their behavior” (p. 201). Since I acted out of resentment, a form of moral outrage which is a “personal protest which expresses our respect for self” (Boss, 2011, p. 201) with the intent to “teach her a lesson” on how degrading it feels to have a roommate not looking out for your best interests, perhaps it would have been a morally right decision if it had produced this expected outcome. Thus, if the result had been a change in my roommate’s behavior, locking her out would have just been a means to an end; when considering the ethical principle of utilitarianism, actions themselves are never right or wrong, morality simply …show more content…
236). In contrast to the theory of utilitarianism, “sees other people not as people with intrinsic worth but as objects for one’s own gratification and benefit” (Boss, 2011, p. 259), which is consonant with my behavior in this scenario. This theory of ethics, regardless, is based on the fact that “people ought to pursue their rational self-interests” because “people achieve happiness by pursuing their rational self-interests” (Boss, 2011, p. 236). When I decided to lock the door and leave my dormitory, I was acting in self-interest knowing that I would feel a small amount of pleasure from this act of vengeance. This act of self-interest, however, was not rational as it was not considering the long-term effects of this
One afternoon, towards the end of this first semester, I was leaving our room when I noticed that she had forgotten her room key inside our room. In this moment, I faced the decision as to whether or not I leave and lock the door, as keeping our door locked when we were both out of our room was one of our policies we made in our roommate contract, or to make sure she had access to her key before I locked the door. I knew that locking the door with her key inside the room would be morally wrong; however, I felt tremendously tempted to spite her, as well as, in juvenile fashion, try and make her understand how upset I was with her. Thus, I left and locked the door feeling justified because, regardless of the fact that I knew she would be locked out, it felt like the only thing I could do to “teach her a lesson” and provide myself a small amount of pleasure after months of the inadequate living situation. What resulted of this decision was that when my roommate returned to our dormitory I had not yet returned, therefore she was unable to gain entry until she contacted someone from residential life to allow her to enter our room. This cost her nothing but a small amount of time and energy to resolve, yet this decision generated momentum which lead us to a point that we both understood that there would be patching our shaky relationship. That being said, although my decision granted me an instant pleasure knowing that I had acted out in a form of revenge, there was a lasting negative effect on our relationship and the decision brought much less pleasure to my life overall. Thus, retrospectively, I do not believe that locking her out of the room was the right thing to do. When considering this situation, however, a right result perhaps could have made this decision the right thing to do, in view of the ethical principle of utilitarianism. “To put aside resentment or moral indignation and forgive in the face of ongoing abuse,” Boss (2011) writes, “serves to absolve oppressors of any need to change their behavior” (p. 201). Since I acted out of resentment, a form of moral outrage which is a “personal protest which expresses our respect for self” (Boss, 2011, p. 201) with the intent to “teach her a lesson” on how degrading it feels to have a roommate not looking out for your best interests, perhaps it would have been a morally right decision if it had produced this expected outcome. Thus, if the result had been a change in my roommate’s behavior, locking her out would have just been a means to an end; when considering the ethical principle of utilitarianism, actions themselves are never right or wrong, morality simply …show more content…
236). In contrast to the theory of utilitarianism, “sees other people not as people with intrinsic worth but as objects for one’s own gratification and benefit” (Boss, 2011, p. 259), which is consonant with my behavior in this scenario. This theory of ethics, regardless, is based on the fact that “people ought to pursue their rational self-interests” because “people achieve happiness by pursuing their rational self-interests” (Boss, 2011, p. 236). When I decided to lock the door and leave my dormitory, I was acting in self-interest knowing that I would feel a small amount of pleasure from this act of vengeance. This act of self-interest, however, was not rational as it was not considering the long-term effects of this