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38 Cards in this Set
- Front
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How many people have NPD? When did the shift towards self-admiration begin ? |
Nearly 1 out of 10 of Americans in their twenties, and 1 out of 16 of those of all ages, has experienced the symptoms of NPD.; The Me Decade was the 1970s- NPD identified in 1971 by Heinz Kohut |
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what is the "national wonder drug"? |
self-esteem- the emphasis on this seems to be very American- in Taiwan and China, they dont even have a word for it. They even talk about how Canada is less narcissistic |
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Where does the word Narcissism come from? |
The word narcissism comes from the Greek myth of Narcissus, an attractive young man who set out looking for someone to love. The beautiful nymph Echo falls in love with him and repeats everything Narcissus says, but he rejects her and she fades away. Narcissus keeps looking for the perfect mate until one day he sees his own reflection in the water. Narcissus falls in love with his own image and gazes at it until he dies. |
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What is the main difference between a narcissist and someone high in self esteem? |
the high self-esteem person who’s not narcissistic values relationships, but the narcissist does not. The result is a fundamentally imbalanced self—a grandiose, inflated self-image and a lack of deep connections to others -narcissists think they are better, smarter, hotter, etc but not necessarily more caring, compassionate, nice |
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what are the two categories of NPD? Do narcissists actually have low self-esteem deep down? |
Outgoing, people who score high on the NPI and more introverted, vulnerable, psychologically empty type; there is no real evidence saying that narcissists are really just insecure people trying to cover up. Using the implicit association test they showed that even implicitly narcissists think they are awesome- they are much slower at pairing themselves with negative words. They also rated letters in their own name as more likeable (but not more "kind" or "nurturing") |
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Is some narcissism healthy? |
you shouldnt hate yourself, but the authors suggest not concentrating on self-feelings - whether they are negative or positive. While it may be adaptive for the narcissist, it tends to hurt others |
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What are some stats on the narcissism epidemic? |
- it is equally as widespread as the obesity epidemic -By 2006, two-thirds of college students scored above the NPI scale’s original 1979–85 sample average, a 30% increase in only two decades - 1 in 16 americans has suffered NPD - richer people arent necessarily more narcissistic |
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Narcissists love winning, but do they? |
- no, narcissism doesnt actually help you succeed - narcissists were more likely to drop out, more likely to have failed an intro psych course - bet more money on their hunches- higher tolerance for risk - they cant take criticism and learn from mistakes- they lack the motivation to improve bc they believe they've already made it - overconfidence may lead to less work/studying One exception : narcissists do better at individual public performance (like American Idol) |
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narcissists and business |
- business owners who were not narcissistic did better - narcissists were using dramatic, highly public corporate strategies. For example, they might buy up a smaller competitor or start a new “cutting-edge” business venture. Non-narcissists were more steady. - narcissists are not popular bosses and would rather take glory for themselves than share it with team |
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Is it beneficial to believe in yourself? (4) |
- high self esteem does not cause better grades, test scores, or job performance - the relation between better performance and SE is the other way around (performance causes SE) - self esteem has risen dramatically, but learning has not im proved (1%) even though the number of A grades given has (83%) - students w bad grades were given either just practice Qs of practice Qs+ a self esteem boost. The SE group's grades Declined! - SE doesnt make good leaders if there are lots of people w high SE in the group, the ones who are caring will emerge as leaders |
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Why are people narcissistic? |
- it feels good, and its usually others that get hurt by it not you- the biggest consequence of narcissism is suffering of people close to them - it is a time-delay-trap (good outcomes up front but hurts you later) - |
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How did narcissism start according to Lasch and Wolfe?
What else might be playing a role (3) |
Lasch said that when the economy faltered in the 70s people turned inward Wolfe said that when the economy got better, excess eas everwhere, children got what they wanted, etc. This theory is spot-on! People raised in hard economic times are less narcissistic, duty-orientes, but it wasnt only the economy, since the 70s we the ME generation. 3 other social trends are responsible: 1) movement towards self esteem 2) self expression (marketed as self-exploration and finding oneself, but not introspective or hard) 3) move from community-oriented to the individual |
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How has parenting changed? (5) What are Indigo children? |
- mothers used to list obedience, religion and manners as best qualities in kids, now they say independence and tolerance: from obedience to autonomy - children are overpraised, over parented told winning is better than caring - children whos parents are more warm AND controlling score higher on narcissism - involvement of parents in childs life compared to the 50s has turned into overinvolvement now- helicopter parenting - role reversals: child dictates what happens, parenting books call for equality btwn parent and child -Indigo children are children spoiled by their parents who are greedy, lustful, proud, etc. They have a need for recognition and a sense of entitlement |
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What advice do the authors give to parents? |
- say no and mean it - dont give your child too much power- be careful how much you ask "do you want..." older kids if they are making choices should have responsibilities that come with - consider the messages you are sending about competition and winning - think twice before you buy your kid something that announces how great he is- "Princess" shirts |
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Fame in our society |
-In 2006, 51% of 18-to 25-year-olds said that “becoming famous” was an important goal of their generation—nearly five times as many as named “becoming more spiritual- people said they wanted to become a celebrity personal assistant over a senator or pres of Harvard - so many shows, products, etc promote self admiration, being special, showing us that overconfidence will lead to success -the authors think harry potter and LOTR are good counterexamples and are somehow convinced that Clooney and Tom Hanks are un-narcissistic celebrities .. |
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what is the Web 2.0? |
- post-2004 internet- the user-focused web - they encourage narcissism even among the humble -in 2006 Time dedicated the issue to "you" for developing the internet (cover had a mirror) - virtual worlds- even in a study in an avatar world, those assigned attractive avatars acted more socially confident, more competitive, and more narcissistic |
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What are 4 messages that the author of Generation Myspace says kids get from social media? |
1) I Must Be Entertained All the Time 2) If You’ve Got It, Flaunt It 3) Success Means Being a Consumer 4) Happiness is a Glamorous Adult (with adulthood defined primarily in terms of sexuality) |
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What negative effects does the spending binge have? |
- prices go up bc everything can be bought with easy credit (most notably houses) - willingness to go into debt has allowed people to present an inflated picture of their own success to the world, and others felt obliged to be like everyone else - the "pleasure principle" is the part of us that thinks we should indulge, get everything we want like kids. this is not reality - house sizes increased! nearly half of new ones built are more than 2400 feet |
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plastic surgery |
- now commonplace - bridal buffets- bride asks the bridesmaids to get work done - lots of ethnic groups are doing it, and doing it to make themselves look more white - 79% said they wouldnt be embarrassed if others knew they had surgery - 20% of plastic surgery patients are now male |
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what is the "cure" for the beauty epidemic? |
- not self-love, narcissists have enough of that - emphasis should be on realism and health - talk frankly about how "wanting to fee better about yourself" should come from achieving something not looking better - watch out for media which is fake |
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Narcissism and materialism. How do we stop the epidemic? |
- narcissists want things that convey status - when told they would meet a stranger narcissists preferred to talk about their material possessions, esp with high status ppl and opposite sex - "Affluenza: the all-consuming epidemic" is a book about how our accumulation of things is a disease - 81% 18-25 yr olds say getting rich is important goal, over leadership and helping others - while the price of stuff fell in 2008 the obsession with stuff remained same - as a result we burn less calories, use more fuel They suggest control of credit cards and mortgages, give people incentives/punishments for wasting |
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Are narcissists aggressive? when is narcissism linked to violent crime? |
- they are unempathtic to others pain and see their own needs above others - talks about fights videotaped to get famous- they dont care if they look like jerks or hurt people - narcissists are not always aggressive- only when criticized or when someone restricts their freedom - in Baumeister study they told people" this is the worst essay ever" and those high in narcissism were more aggressive than others -Narcissism is linked to violent crime in two contexts: when there is the possibility of gaining fame, and when there is an ego threat or rejection. - narcissism plays a role in crimes related to fame/ego/ attention seeking, not money or demographics |
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aggression+ self-esteem/narcissism |
Baumeister study: -people high in both self-esteem and narcissism were the most aggressive—more than those high in narcissism but low in self-esteem, or those low in narcissism but high in self-esteem, or those low in both. -Far from discouraging aggression, self-admiration causes aggression when it crosses over into narcissism. another study: preteen children with high self-esteem justified their aggression toward others by rationalizing it away. Those who felt great about themselves were able to preserve their self-admiration by convincing themselves that other kids deserved to get beaten up. |
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“Isn’t it fun to get the respect we’re going to deserve?” What study was prompted by this? |
- this is said by Eric Harris, one of the Columbine shooters - hugely narcissistic - authors wondered if narcissism+social rejection caused more aggression - people met with peers then were separated told no one had picked them to be a partner. -Participants who were both narcissistic and socially rejected by others were highly aggressive toward someone else |
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Why didnt school shootings start earlier, in the 70s along with narcissism? How can we fix the larger epidemic this is a part of? |
these types of social behaviors need to get attention before most people think about perpetrating them. Before school shootings received extensive media attention in the late ’90s, people didn’t think of shooting a group of their fellow students as a way to get fame. we can fix the problem with fame and aggression by not covering it on the media, punish kids who are aggressive (jail) and having honours codes with strong social norms supporting them so that cheating isnt the norm |
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Sarbanes-Oxley law |
law requiring that company CEOs certify the accuracy of their revenue reporting because corporate fraud was so rampant in the early 2000s - discussing cheating - 74% highschoolers have cheated, two/thirds of all teens, yet 93% are okay with their morals |
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Describe a relationship with a narcissist |
- exciting, but awful. about feeding egos- theres and sometimes yours - when your needs don't align with theirs they're gone - relationships for narcissists are fungible - one can be exchanged for another (or even for a material thing) if it isnt feeding the ego |
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narcissism and rape |
- when he narcissist is told "no" this activates his aggression - "no" is one of the three triggers of narcissistic aggression along with ego threat and rejection |
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chocolate cake trap |
you can pick chocolate cake or broccoli - you choose the cake- sugary, rush, makes you feel loved- but then sugar leaves and you feel depressed, sleepy, guilty - this is like a relationship with a narcissist- it is fun and flashy but you realize it lacks substance - if you had eaten the broccoli you would'nt have gotten the big rush in the beginning, bit you would've be better in the long run in a study people who met narcissists the first time thought they were likeable and much more exciting than others, but after a couple times, this wore off |
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you have to love yourself to love others |
- there is no evidence this is true - people with low self esteem choose partners equally as well and care about their partneres - we should encourage people to be decent people and get ego gratification from that |
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can you change a narcissist? describe the study by Finkel and the other one |
-they rarely change -but if you try, dont challenge their inflates self image - try to encourage feelings of morality, caring and kindness in the narcissist - set up situation where acts of kindness + caring are aligned with admiration and success - make them get ego gratification by being a good person - educate people on the benefits of stable relationships - showed them pictures of smiling, caring people vs neutral images like trees, but subliminally. then showed them words,and they had to push a button indicating if it described them or not. In these were commitment words. Narcissists showed greater levels of commitment (as many as non-narcissists) when shown the smiling pictures - another study asked Ns whether their partner made them feel caring and compassionate. Those that said yes reported becoming more committed |
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Entitlement |
This is the trap of entitlement: it can be great to think that you are number one, but it is not so great living with or working with others who also think they are number one. Unlike some of the other symptoms of narcissism, such as materialism or vanity, entitlement is like a ghost, difficult to see in solid form, but increasingly wafting its cold, cloudy fingers into everything. - 2/3 of students believed prof should give them special consideration if they said they were trying hard, 1/3 said they should reschedule exam for vacation |
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Taking candy from children |
college students filled out questionnaires measuring entitlement, then passed candy labelled "child development lab" and told them to take as much as they thought they deserved. More entitlement, more candy |
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entitled people... |
- confuse hard work with actually producing something good - unwilling to see the world through anothers eyes - want praise - some companies are hiring praise consultants! - they dont see reciprocity as a two-way street |
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Religion |
- is helpful for narcissism , but is withering - they teach counter-narcissism sayings like turn the other cheek and treat others how you would want to be treated - eastern religions see egotism as a source of suffering - modern religion tries to take narcissism and tries to turn it into altruism Joel Osteen is a pastor that says "to win is to honour God" - many churches today practice "prosperity"- God doesnt want you to be poor |
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volunteering |
- volunteering has increased, but for resumes and applications - giving money to charities has decreased - people that do good things these days get rewards of fame |
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Disease model of narcissism |
- diseases need a host, a means of transmission, and a new host - Individuals+culture is becoming more narcissistic by the day= host - media + internet= means of transmission - Other people and cultures around the globe are becoming infected |
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global spread of narcissism |
- American TV show Dallas helped bring down communism in Eastern Europe. - whether other countries are infected depends on their natural antibodies- their resistance to narcissism by their collectivist cultural values - narcissism has spread to china, where people are even trying to combing culture with American provocativeness and fame. China's one-child policy might have led to this! "little Emperor Syndrome" |
