Assessment Prepared By: _______Katie Fuhs____________________
1) What are the strengths of the myth? Which elements are most compelling? Do the plot and characters make sense?
The biggest strengths of this myth are most definitely the application and combination of the plots, themes, struggles, characters of the ancient myths we have read in class. This original story obviously had many influences, and you do a wonderful job of weaving these points into a believable story. The references and parallels to other myths didn’t feel awkward or forced.
My two favorite scenes/ideas from your myth were the second paragraph on page two and the idea that Astyanax retires his father’s armor by displaying it in the marketplace. The idea is absolutely perfect for our group’s concentration on political/city heroes. Now, the city of Hectia has symbology and items to worship! The loved the paragraph because of the wonderful descriptive language you used to imagine the scene of the ship being ripped apart and the men falling into and drowning in the water.
The plot makes sense for the most part. There are some inconsistencies that I mention in the third section of this peer review assessment. Other than that, the characters make sense in this story. Besides the random mention of the Achaeans, everyone in the story seems like they should logically be there. 2) Are there clear connections between this myth and the Greek/Roman sources? There are references and parallels between this myth and many other stories about Greek heroes. Achilles and Odysseus are two of the more obvious connections. Also, you mimicked the gods’ tendency to appear to mortal in their time of need or just as general companions in a manner that stayed true to the stories we have read so far. For example, Athena helping Astyanax in this myth is exactly like Athena helping Odysseus or Telemachus in Homer’s Odyssey. My favorite reference in your original myth is the reference to Athena’s temple in Troy. In Euripides’ Trojan Women, we hear that the temple has been ransacked and dishonored by the Achaeans. Specifically, Cassandra was raped in the temple by Ajax the Lesser. I find your integration of the fallen and trampled temple to be genius. 3) What suggestions do you have for polishing the story? Note any grammar or spelling mistakes. There were two main instances where, as a reader, I was confused. …show more content…
First, at the end of page one, Hermes wants to stop Astyanax from starting another war. However, a few paragraphs later, Hermes doesn’t want the boy to fight the war alone. Of course, you can keep this as a reminder of the endless inconsistencies of myths and the vast differences between different versions of the same story. The second time I was confused was when you mention the Achaeans’ army disbanding after hearing the Hectian king’s tale. Did you mean the Hectian army? If you meant the Achaean army, I would recommend taking this out because this story doesn’t seem to be about them. You mention them too late in the story, so at this point it seems random or out of place. However, maybe you could write more about the Achaeans throughout the story. There were a few easy mistakes to fix in the rough draft. For example, there were a few phrases that
1) What are the strengths of the myth? Which elements are most compelling? Do the plot and characters make sense?
The biggest strengths of this myth are most definitely the application and combination of the plots, themes, struggles, characters of the ancient myths we have read in class. This original story obviously had many influences, and you do a wonderful job of weaving these points into a believable story. The references and parallels to other myths didn’t feel awkward or forced.
My two favorite scenes/ideas from your myth were the second paragraph on page two and the idea that Astyanax retires his father’s armor by displaying it in the marketplace. The idea is absolutely perfect for our group’s concentration on political/city heroes. Now, the city of Hectia has symbology and items to worship! The loved the paragraph because of the wonderful descriptive language you used to imagine the scene of the ship being ripped apart and the men falling into and drowning in the water.
The plot makes sense for the most part. There are some inconsistencies that I mention in the third section of this peer review assessment. Other than that, the characters make sense in this story. Besides the random mention of the Achaeans, everyone in the story seems like they should logically be there. 2) Are there clear connections between this myth and the Greek/Roman sources? There are references and parallels between this myth and many other stories about Greek heroes. Achilles and Odysseus are two of the more obvious connections. Also, you mimicked the gods’ tendency to appear to mortal in their time of need or just as general companions in a manner that stayed true to the stories we have read so far. For example, Athena helping Astyanax in this myth is exactly like Athena helping Odysseus or Telemachus in Homer’s Odyssey. My favorite reference in your original myth is the reference to Athena’s temple in Troy. In Euripides’ Trojan Women, we hear that the temple has been ransacked and dishonored by the Achaeans. Specifically, Cassandra was raped in the temple by Ajax the Lesser. I find your integration of the fallen and trampled temple to be genius. 3) What suggestions do you have for polishing the story? Note any grammar or spelling mistakes. There were two main instances where, as a reader, I was confused. …show more content…
First, at the end of page one, Hermes wants to stop Astyanax from starting another war. However, a few paragraphs later, Hermes doesn’t want the boy to fight the war alone. Of course, you can keep this as a reminder of the endless inconsistencies of myths and the vast differences between different versions of the same story. The second time I was confused was when you mention the Achaeans’ army disbanding after hearing the Hectian king’s tale. Did you mean the Hectian army? If you meant the Achaean army, I would recommend taking this out because this story doesn’t seem to be about them. You mention them too late in the story, so at this point it seems random or out of place. However, maybe you could write more about the Achaeans throughout the story. There were a few easy mistakes to fix in the rough draft. For example, there were a few phrases that