Astonished by my discovery, I continued to stare at her, and then, boom, eye contact. It must be one of the creepiest moments in my life as she tightened her lips when staring …show more content…
I can tell. But remember, you have to stay away from blacks! They are evil!” Hitting me again, she punished me for not adoring her “marvelous” points. Think how ridiculous it was! She was doing exactly what black people in her words would do! My patience was officially worn out as I was about to throw one hundred rebuttals at her pathetic white face or white everything. However, just before my words blurting out, I thought about the fact that she was homeless. The image of injecting heroin, dealing weapons in the broken garage and the sound of drunken shrieks appeared in my mind. I was terrified by the potential trouble she might bring. As much as I wanted to convince myself that these were all stereotypes, I couldn’t stymie a feeling of fear. Accordingly, I just kept nodding while she kept indoctrinating me, until I got to my stop.
That day, after I arrived my host home, I shared this experience with my host family and complained about how terrible and ignorant racists were.
My hostess, a smart Chinese immigrant said after sighing, “There are still a lot of people who discriminate African Americans. They are sometimes very extreme, or even dangerous, but that does not necessarily mean they shot people when others disagree. Words can sometimes be the most fatal weapon, which may destroy an undetermined person’s ideology or hurt others, African Americans in this case, deeply. Vice versa, we must defend the equality of the world with our words. …show more content…
I did not answer.
After dinner, I locked myself up in the room, thinking about my experience and my host mother’s words. What drove me to nod to her words and to perform like a racist? Is it because of my stereotype of homeless people, my fear to my own imagination, or the stupid idea that just submitting one time does not matter? But was my stereotype of homeless the same with her stereotype to black people? But what would happen if I nod to this kind of theory every time I want to avoid trouble? Is keeping silent to racism a kind of racism?
A few days later, I saw her sitting in the same bus and talking to another girl. Thinking of the castle in my heart and another bomb in her hand, I walked towards her, and said,