2013, end of my Sophomore year, was the year I became best friends with a guy who is now a stranger. The first time Zach and I met was when he moved to Queen City in the 8th grade. April of our 8th grade year we voted on class favorites and we both were awarded the most courteous award, which was awkward because I barely knew the guy. It was not until the end of my Sophomore year that I actually talked to him and by Junior year we were dating. The reciprocal part of the attraction theory, the clinging to first impression part of attribution error, and the Knapp’s Relational Development, though not in order, terminating coming before stagnation and avoidance, describe our relationship well.
The Knapp’s Relational Development is one of the best known explanations of how communication works in relationships. According to Adler, Rodman, and Pré (2014), the model was created by “Mark Knapp, whose developmental model broke down the rise and fall of relationships into 10 stages” (p. 207). Researchers suggested that any model of relationships should contain a third part, “a stage in which communication is aimed at keeping stable relationships operating smoothly and satisfactorily” (p. 208). Knapp’s first five stages include coming together, initiating, experimenting, intensifying, integrating, and bonding. Knapp’s second five stages include coming apart, differentiating, circumscribing, stagnating, avoiding, and terminating. The first stage in Knapp’s is the initiating stage. …show more content…
According to Adler, Rodman, and Pré (2014), “the stage of initiation involves the initial making of contact with another person” (p. 208). Zach moved to Queen City, Texas from Holiday in the middle of our 8th grade year because he loved our band program. I remember the first day he came to band he wore a Bill Chase shirt and everyone thought his name was Chase. One of the first concerts he performed with us was our Spring concert and we played The Incredibles. A few weeks later we voted for class favorites and since Zach was a new guy no one really expected him to win anything. When the votes came in, it was announced that Zach and I were voted most courteous for our grade. I had never talked to Zach before, I just saw him as a nice, nerdy trumpet player. The first time I spoke to Zach was when we took our class favorite picture and he had to pretend to open the door for me. We formally introduced ourselves and talked about band, all the schools he had been at, and sports. This was the beginning of a wonderful friendship. Zach and I went through the rest of our 8th grade to the end of our Sophomore year just hanging out as friends. By now we have reached the second stage of Knapp’s which, is the experimentation stage. In this stage, “conversation develops as people get acquainted by making small talk” (Adler, Rodman, & Pré, 2014, p. 209). There was a point in our lives where both of our significant others started talking and hanging out with each other more than normal friends do. We were both very confused by that situation and bonded over that. We both ditched our significant others and started talking to each other a lot more, realizing that we had feelings for each other. The summer before our Junior year we spent almost every single day together for two months, flirting with each other a little more each day, experimenting our relationship. It was during this stage I realized we had a reciprocal attraction. Adler, Rodman, and Pré (2014), say that reciprocal attraction is when “we are attracted to people who like us” (p. 201). People who approve of us boost our self-esteem and that’s how our relationship began. During that same summer of junior year, I went to a church camp right after Zach and I had really started liking each other. I began to realize our relationship had reached the intensifying stage. During this stage, “the expression of feelings toward the other becomes more common” (Adler et al., 2014, p. 209). When I got back from church camp, I spent the night at a friend’s house and the next morning Zach surprised me with chocolate chip waffles and eggs. We spent all day at my friend’s house with her and her
The Knapp’s Relational Development is one of the best known explanations of how communication works in relationships. According to Adler, Rodman, and Pré (2014), the model was created by “Mark Knapp, whose developmental model broke down the rise and fall of relationships into 10 stages” (p. 207). Researchers suggested that any model of relationships should contain a third part, “a stage in which communication is aimed at keeping stable relationships operating smoothly and satisfactorily” (p. 208). Knapp’s first five stages include coming together, initiating, experimenting, intensifying, integrating, and bonding. Knapp’s second five stages include coming apart, differentiating, circumscribing, stagnating, avoiding, and terminating. The first stage in Knapp’s is the initiating stage. …show more content…
According to Adler, Rodman, and Pré (2014), “the stage of initiation involves the initial making of contact with another person” (p. 208). Zach moved to Queen City, Texas from Holiday in the middle of our 8th grade year because he loved our band program. I remember the first day he came to band he wore a Bill Chase shirt and everyone thought his name was Chase. One of the first concerts he performed with us was our Spring concert and we played The Incredibles. A few weeks later we voted for class favorites and since Zach was a new guy no one really expected him to win anything. When the votes came in, it was announced that Zach and I were voted most courteous for our grade. I had never talked to Zach before, I just saw him as a nice, nerdy trumpet player. The first time I spoke to Zach was when we took our class favorite picture and he had to pretend to open the door for me. We formally introduced ourselves and talked about band, all the schools he had been at, and sports. This was the beginning of a wonderful friendship. Zach and I went through the rest of our 8th grade to the end of our Sophomore year just hanging out as friends. By now we have reached the second stage of Knapp’s which, is the experimentation stage. In this stage, “conversation develops as people get acquainted by making small talk” (Adler, Rodman, & Pré, 2014, p. 209). There was a point in our lives where both of our significant others started talking and hanging out with each other more than normal friends do. We were both very confused by that situation and bonded over that. We both ditched our significant others and started talking to each other a lot more, realizing that we had feelings for each other. The summer before our Junior year we spent almost every single day together for two months, flirting with each other a little more each day, experimenting our relationship. It was during this stage I realized we had a reciprocal attraction. Adler, Rodman, and Pré (2014), say that reciprocal attraction is when “we are attracted to people who like us” (p. 201). People who approve of us boost our self-esteem and that’s how our relationship began. During that same summer of junior year, I went to a church camp right after Zach and I had really started liking each other. I began to realize our relationship had reached the intensifying stage. During this stage, “the expression of feelings toward the other becomes more common” (Adler et al., 2014, p. 209). When I got back from church camp, I spent the night at a friend’s house and the next morning Zach surprised me with chocolate chip waffles and eggs. We spent all day at my friend’s house with her and her