Schnarch: Becoming a Self
As I inquire about what it takes to become a satisfied woman, I am discovering satisfaction comes from within and it requires an individual to have a strong core self. From a developmental perspective, Dr. David Schnarch explores the process of the emerging self in his book Intimacy & Desire. He writes about the importance of developing a solid flexible self rather than relying on others to make you feel okay. He thinks the first emerged self was a “reflected sense of self” meaning a self that is reliant on feedback from others.
Schnarch writes that it’s not child trauma nor constant attention or reassurance that gives a person a solid sense of self. “A solid sense of self develops from confronting yourself, …show more content…
“Think of differentiation as your ability to keep your emotional balance while interacting in important relationships,” writes Schnarch. In addition, Schnarch defines differentiation as “the ability to soothe your own anxiety and to resist being infected with other people’s anxiety.” Anxiety in the family gets passed from person to person similar to an infectious contagion. David Schnarch posits that a person must differentiate from their family and develop a self in order to find satisfaction in their relationships. He writes that differentiation is evolution. Differentiation is the ability to hold onto your self and maintain your emotional balance in a relationship. Differentiation occurs naturally in nature and it happens when members of the same species stay in contact with each …show more content…
“You start seeking happiness and fuller meanings in life. It’s not always fun: You will experience difficult soul-searching and have to go through self-confrontation. But it’s the pathway to enlightenment, wisdom, and compassion.”
Adlerian Psychology
Alfred Adler, the Vienne 's psychologist of the early 1900s was a contemporary of Sigmund Freud and Carl Jung, and the father of Individual Psychology. Adler’s emphasis was on holism and he treated his patients as “whole persons.” He saw the importance of holism as it pertained to the development of human beings. Adler believed that individuals developed a story about themselves in early childhood and he called this “the lifestyle.” The lifestyle guides a person’s perceptions and choices throughout life.
The Meaning of Life
Adler spoke of the human struggle, a tug of war going on inside the individual all the time. The struggle is about finding the meaning of life. Adler’s Individual Psychology found that all human problems can be grouped under these headings: occupational, social and sexual. Adler writes that all humans must take in account the three tasks of life and answer these questions to deal with the problems that constantly confront us. Adler summarizes, it is in their response to these problems that individuals unfailingly reveal their own personal
As I inquire about what it takes to become a satisfied woman, I am discovering satisfaction comes from within and it requires an individual to have a strong core self. From a developmental perspective, Dr. David Schnarch explores the process of the emerging self in his book Intimacy & Desire. He writes about the importance of developing a solid flexible self rather than relying on others to make you feel okay. He thinks the first emerged self was a “reflected sense of self” meaning a self that is reliant on feedback from others.
Schnarch writes that it’s not child trauma nor constant attention or reassurance that gives a person a solid sense of self. “A solid sense of self develops from confronting yourself, …show more content…
“Think of differentiation as your ability to keep your emotional balance while interacting in important relationships,” writes Schnarch. In addition, Schnarch defines differentiation as “the ability to soothe your own anxiety and to resist being infected with other people’s anxiety.” Anxiety in the family gets passed from person to person similar to an infectious contagion. David Schnarch posits that a person must differentiate from their family and develop a self in order to find satisfaction in their relationships. He writes that differentiation is evolution. Differentiation is the ability to hold onto your self and maintain your emotional balance in a relationship. Differentiation occurs naturally in nature and it happens when members of the same species stay in contact with each …show more content…
“You start seeking happiness and fuller meanings in life. It’s not always fun: You will experience difficult soul-searching and have to go through self-confrontation. But it’s the pathway to enlightenment, wisdom, and compassion.”
Adlerian Psychology
Alfred Adler, the Vienne 's psychologist of the early 1900s was a contemporary of Sigmund Freud and Carl Jung, and the father of Individual Psychology. Adler’s emphasis was on holism and he treated his patients as “whole persons.” He saw the importance of holism as it pertained to the development of human beings. Adler believed that individuals developed a story about themselves in early childhood and he called this “the lifestyle.” The lifestyle guides a person’s perceptions and choices throughout life.
The Meaning of Life
Adler spoke of the human struggle, a tug of war going on inside the individual all the time. The struggle is about finding the meaning of life. Adler’s Individual Psychology found that all human problems can be grouped under these headings: occupational, social and sexual. Adler writes that all humans must take in account the three tasks of life and answer these questions to deal with the problems that constantly confront us. Adler summarizes, it is in their response to these problems that individuals unfailingly reveal their own personal