Listening is the foundation of any relationship. In order for any relationship to grow both parties need to understand where each other is coming from. There will be disagreements, emotional obstacles, and many more bumps that every relationship has to face. Now what sets apart a strong committed relationship from others is the understanding of how important listening is. Strong committed couples use effective listening when communicating but can sometimes run into problems preventing them from understanding each other. These problems are known as common listening barriers. Some examples of barriers are close-mindedness, information overload, competitive interrupting, as well as glazing over. Being able to talk through these sorts of communication
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This is when we divide our attention between listening and daydreaming. In other words, we go back and forth from listening to a person to letting our minds wander (Floyd, 2016, p.233). Many of us find ourselves doing this constantly because our brains are working too fast for our own good. The brain can process 600 words a minute but, on average, a person will speak less than 150 words per minute. Clearly this leaves a lot of down time for our brains when listening to someone and our thoughts begin to wander. This can lead to problems in a relationship because of the miscommunication it can cause. For example, if a girlfriend/boyfriend tells you to meet them for lunch while you are on one of these daydreaming escapes, you may find yourself not even realizing what your significant other said. You may not know you had a lunch to be at until you are getting an ear full over the phone. This is just one of the many examples where this could affect a couple and their relationship but it shows how important it is to listen to your partner and focus when they are talking; if not they may feel neglected and the relationship could be short lived. So how do we avoid these problems? To avoid this you must force yourself to focus and really listen to what your partner is saying. Sometimes you can see when a person is glazing over and drifting away from a conversation (Bostrom, 1984, p.268). Another way you can avoid your partner glazing over is to watch your listener and seeing if they look like they are truly listening, if not say something to them to get their attention and get them back into the
This is when we divide our attention between listening and daydreaming. In other words, we go back and forth from listening to a person to letting our minds wander (Floyd, 2016, p.233). Many of us find ourselves doing this constantly because our brains are working too fast for our own good. The brain can process 600 words a minute but, on average, a person will speak less than 150 words per minute. Clearly this leaves a lot of down time for our brains when listening to someone and our thoughts begin to wander. This can lead to problems in a relationship because of the miscommunication it can cause. For example, if a girlfriend/boyfriend tells you to meet them for lunch while you are on one of these daydreaming escapes, you may find yourself not even realizing what your significant other said. You may not know you had a lunch to be at until you are getting an ear full over the phone. This is just one of the many examples where this could affect a couple and their relationship but it shows how important it is to listen to your partner and focus when they are talking; if not they may feel neglected and the relationship could be short lived. So how do we avoid these problems? To avoid this you must force yourself to focus and really listen to what your partner is saying. Sometimes you can see when a person is glazing over and drifting away from a conversation (Bostrom, 1984, p.268). Another way you can avoid your partner glazing over is to watch your listener and seeing if they look like they are truly listening, if not say something to them to get their attention and get them back into the