Before breaking with his religion, any hints of sexuality comes with guilt and doubt. When Emma comes into his life, it all changes. When Stephen met Emma, he gazed at her, and thought in his head “nobody is looking. I could hold her and kiss her” (73). This feeling evokes deep down in his heart. It is the first time he interacts with a girl by himself, making him think deeper into his feelings. Even though he has a desire to kiss and hold her, the religious part of him is aware of the wrongs and the rights. He is concerned and examines “that nobody is looking.” Emma also inspired some of Stephen’s first romantic poem by evoking his feelings of love and desire. Stephen's visit to the brothel indicates a major step in his growing up. By succumbing to “the evil seed of lust” and “lose[ing] God’s holy grace and fall into grievous sin” (118), Stephen “becomes strong and fearless and sure of himself” (107). Now he values living life to its fullest and pleasure over condemnation of sin. Here, Stephen is losing the idea …show more content…
As he grows to have independence in his thoughts, education provides changes for his view on several things like faith and need of a companion. He has been attending schools throughout his childhood and adolescence years. He informally learns from home when he is young from the relatives that surrounded the house. Dante, his governess, “knows a lot of things. She had taught him where the Mozambique Channel was and what was the longest river in America and what was the name of the highest mountain in the moon” (7). For little Stephen, geography is so mesmerizing because it is a glimpse of the world outside his reach. This is also a foreshadow to Stephen's later departure from Ireland to places in Europe. The vital knowledge that influences his political view of the country comes from his family dinner. He quietly observes and learns about politics through the argument between his father, Mr. Casey, and Dente at their Christmas dinner about Parnell. Seeing it on the news and listening to his family, “It pained him that he did not know well what politics meant and that he did not know where the universe ended” (14). As time passes, he is exposed to more literature towards the aesthetic realms of "beauty amid the spectral of Aristotle [and] Aquinas" (190). In his journal he wrote, “I may learn in my own life and away from home and friends what the heart is and what it feels” (275). His sense of